Morbidly Obsese Soldiers

Today I was on a military base and went by Burger King to pick up some lunch. In the drive-thru, the guy in front of me told the drive-thru woman, "I'd like one of everything."

"Excuse me?" she asked.

"I would like one of everything on your menu."

"Are you serious, sir?"

"Yes. And I'd like two of each kids meal. I need the toddler toy too."

"Sir, you are going to have to come inside to complete your order."

"I can do that."

He then drove around and parked, walking inside with much determination. I pulled up and ordered chicken tenders and a chocolate milk shake. Today, I also saw a midget jogging with a radio headset.

Won't you be my neighbor?

I walked home the other day to find Landon, the chihuahua, wearing a sweater resembling that of Mr. Rogers. That's about all there is to that story; it was an choice of fashion. Since Brian started buying clothing for the chihuahua, I havn't had a dull moment. There's just something about a dog dressed in American Eagle that just seems to change the dynamics of any situation.

Speaking of my roommates, I played Kings the other night with four gay men and three women. On "never have I ever," everyone had only one finger left. Therefore, I proclaimed, "Never have I ever sucked a dick." Everyone but me had to drink.

It's really been an uneventful last few days, ever since I went to New Jersey without actually making it to New Jersey. Until something happens, enjoy a video of the Fat Jew

Women in the Army

Today at the museum I was told to search through the special collections for pictures of women in the Transportation Corps doing work to submit to the Women in the Army Museum. While I know that women in the Army actually do work, if I based my assumption on their role based only on the photographs I found that pre-dated Operation Enduring Freedom, I would be under the exact opposite impression. Photographs from Desert Shield and Desert Storm depict the following:

-Women watching television
-Women lounging outside tents in the sun
-Women getting food from a grill
-Women shaking hands with Colin Powell
-Women standing off to the side
-Women breakdancing
-Women watching other people get promoted
-Women watching men unload a truck
-Women watching men repair a truck
-Women watching men put up a tent
-Women watching men repair a helicopter

I did eventually find one picture of a woman in the army doing work from Desert Shield though:

-Woman scrubbing kitchen floor

We figured it was for the best if that last picture was not submitted.

While searching for those photos I stumbled upon photos of gun trucks from the Vietnam War. Not only do they look cool, but the names and artwork on the side are awesome. While "Eve of Destruction" is my sentimental favorite just because I see it several times a week, the best names would have to be "Snoopy" and "The Abortion." In addition, there is one named "Devil Woman," but I don't think the Women's Museum wanted that picture.